[Frameworks] Asking for a friend / naming names

[C Keefer]

I agree with Amanda,
"naming aggressors should come from the people who have personally been
hurt by them…" - and only by them. I agree, that one should
"make sure to be careful about who gets to tell their own stories."  Also,
repeating hearsay is obviously not acceptable.

But beyond that - though I haven't read every single post these last few
days, I do see we have two men telling us this listserve is not the
appropriate place to name names (and not for the above reasons).

I think those who wish to name their own attackers/aggressors can do so
anywhere they f**ing please, and should not be told by men where it is
appropriate to do so.

Though a separate issue - I've been severely slandered by men on several of
these listserves (not for sexual, but professional issues) and I am so
tired of men who think they can say whatever they please on these lists, no
matter how libelous and harmful. One was forced by his employer to write a
multiple page apology letter to the other party involved in his fictional
incident - but no apology to me, and no public correction of the false
accusation, though he was clearly wrong and libelous. Simply put, he used
this list for slander and falsehoods. This is not always a welcoming
community, as Pip described.

Do not try to tell us what we are allowed to say and where, about our own
experiences, when this kind of behavior continues.

Cindy Keefer



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